Wheatear Stitch

CHILDHOOD, n.  The period of human life intermediate between the idiocy of infancy and the folly of youth--two removes from the sin of manhood and three from the remorse of age.

Leaf Panel

DANGER,n. 

 A savage beast which, when it sleeps, 

Man girds at and despises,

But takes himself away by leaps

And bounds when it arises.

Ambat Delaso.

Diamond Panel

ESOTERIC, adj.  Very particularly abstruse and consummately occult.  The ancient philosophies were of two kinds,--exoteric, those that the philosophers themselves could partly understand, and esoteric, those that nobody could understand.  It is the latter that have most profoundly affected modern thought and found greatest acceptance in our time. 

Faggoted Panel

POETRY, n.  A form of expression peculiar to the Land beyond the Magazines.

Little Lace Panel

DELUGE, n.  A notable first experiment in baptism which washed away the sins (and sinners) of the world.

Eight-Stitch Cable

ACHIEVEMENT, n.  The death of endeavor and the birth of disgust.

Six-Stitch Cable

ACCORDION, n.  An instrument in harmony with the sentiments of an assassin.

Four-Stitch Cable 1

ACCORD, n.  Harmony.

Organ Pipes

ACCUSE, v. t.  To affirm another's guilt or unworth; most commonly as a justification of ourselves for having wronged him.

Knotted Cords

JESTER, n.  An officer formerly attached to a king's household, whose business it was to amuse the court by ludicrous actions and utterances, the absurdity being attested by his motley costume.  The king himself being attired with dignity, it took the world some centuries to discover that his own conduct and decrees were sufficiently ridiculous for the amusement not only of his court but of all mankind.  The jester was commonly called a fool, but the poets and romancers have ever delighted to represent him as a singularly wise and witty person.  In the circus of to-day the melancholy ghost of the court fool effects the dejection of humbler audiences with the same jests wherewith in life he gloomed the marble hall, panged the patrician sense of humor and tapped the tank of royal tears.

The widow-queen of Portugal

Had an audacious jester

Who entered the confessional

Disguised, and there confessed her.

"Father," she said, "thine ear bend down--
My sins are more than scarlet:
I love my fool--blashpeming clown,
And common, base-born varlet."

"Daughter," the mimic priest replied,
"That sin, indeed, is awful:
The church's pardon is denied
To love that is unlawful.

"But since thy stubborn heart will be 
For him forever (sleeping)pleading, 
Thou'dst better make him, by decree,
A man of birth and breeding."

She made the fool a duke, in hope
With Heaven's taboo to palter;
Then told a priest, who told the Pope,
Who damned her from the altar!

Barel Dort.

Chevron

CLAIRVOYANT, n.  A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron--namely, that he is a blockhead.

Rose-Hip Stitch

BRIDE, n.  A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.

Eyelet Knot Stitch

BRAIN, n.  An apparatus with which we think that we think. That which distinguishes the man who is content to be something from the man who wishes to do something.  A man of great wealth, or one who has been pitchforked into high station, has commonly such a headful of brain that his neighbors cannot keep their hats on.  In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, brain is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.

Trellis Lace

MAN, n.  An animal so lost in rapturous contemplation of what he thinks he is as to overlook what he indubitably ought to be.  His chief occupation is extermination of other animals and his own species, which, however, multiplies with such insistent rapidity as to infest the whole habitable earth and Canada.

When the world was young and Man was new,

And everything was pleasant,

Distinctions Nature never drew

'Mongst king and priest and peasant.

We're not that way at present,

Save here in this Republic, where 

We have that old re'gime,

For all are kings, however bare

Their backs, howe'er extreme

Their hunger.  And, indeed, each has a voice

To accept the tyrant of his party's choice.

A citizen who would not vote,

And, therefore, was detested,

Was one day with a tarry coat

(With feathers backed and breasted)

By patriots invested.

"It is your duty," cried the crowd,

"Your ballot true to cast

For the man o' your choice."  He humbly bowed,

And explained his wicked past:

"That's what I very gladly would have done,

Dear patriots, but he has never run."

Apperton Duke.

Feather Lace

HASH, x. There is no definition for this word--nobody knows what hash is.

Ridged Lace 1

FOOL, n.  A person who pervades the domain of intellectual speculation and diffuses himself through the channels of moral activity.  He is omnific, omniform, omnipercipient, omniscient, omnipotent.  He  it was who invented letters, printing, the railroad, the steamboat, the telegraph, the platitude and the circle of the sciences.  He created patriotism and taught the nations war--founded theology, philosophy, law, medicine and Chicago.  He established monarchical and republican government.  He is from everlasting to everlasting--such as creation's dawn beheld he fooleth now.  In the morning of time he sang upon primitive hills, and in the noonday of existence headed the procession of being.  His grandmotherly hand has warmly tucked-in the set sun of civilization, and in the twilight he prepares Man's evening meal of milk-and-morality and turns down the covers of the universal grave.  And after the rest of us shall have retired for the night of eternal oblivion he will sit up to write a history of human civilization.

Fishtail Lace

FINANCE, n.  The art or science of managing revenues and resources for the best advantage of the manager.  The pronunciation of this word with the i long and the accent on the first syllable is one of America's most precious discoveries and possessions.

Gotta have ART!

https://www.deviantart.com/users/rockedout

How to spell RELIEF

split personality

LOL

I crack myself up!

Se'jour prenons un pot!

http://sejourprenonsunpot.blogspot.com/

http://insani-tea.blogspot.com/

http://coffeeworks.blogs.com

Lace and Cables

FIDELITY, n.  A virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed.

Lacy Bubbles

FEMALE, n.  One of the opposing, or unfair, sex.

The Maker, at Creation's birth,

With livng things had stocked the earth.

From elephants to bats and snails,

They all were good, for all were males.

But when the Devil came and saw

He said: "By Thine eternal law

Of growth, maturity, decay,

These all must quickly pass away

And leave untenanted the earth

Unless Thou dost establish birth"--

Then tucked his head beneath his wing

To laugh--he had no sleeve--the thing

With deviltry did so accord,

That he'd suggested to the Lord.

The Master pondered this advice,

Then shook and threw thefateful dice

Wherewith all matters here below

Are ordered, and observed the throw;

Then bent His head in awful state,

Confirming the decree of Fate.

From every part of earth anew

The conscious dust consenting flew,

While rivers from their courses rolled

To Make it plastic for the mould.

Enough collected (but no more,

For niggard Nature hoards her store)

He kneaded it to flexile clay,

While Nick unseen threw some away.

And then the various forms He cast,

Gross organs first and finer last;

No one at once evolved, but all

By even touches grew and small

Degrees advanced, till, shade by shade,

To match all living things He'd made

Females, complete in all their parts

Except (His clay gave out) the hearts.

"No matter," Satan cried; "with speed 

I'll fetch the very hearts they need"--

So flew away and soon brought back

The number needed, in a sack.

That night earth rang with sounds of strife--

Ten million males had each a wife;

That night sweet Peace her pinions spread

O'er Hell--ten million devils dead!

G. J.

Waterfall

AGE, n.  That period of life in which we compound for the vices that we still cherish by reviling those that we have no longer the enterprise to commit.

Eyelets

NOSE, n.  The extreme outpost of the face.  From the circumstance that great conquerors have great noses, Getius, whose writings antedate the age of humor, calls the nose the organ of quell.  It has been observed that one's nose is never so happy as when thrust into the affairs of another, from which some physiologists have drawn the inference that the nose is devoid of the sense of smell.

There's a man with a Nose,

And wherever he goes

The people run from him and shout:

"No cotton have we

For our ears if so be

He blow that interminous snout!"

So the lawyers applied

For injunction.  "Denied,"

Said the Judge: "the defendant prefixion,

Whate'er it protend,

Appears to transcen

The bounds of this court's jurisdiction."

Arpad Singiny.

Herringbone Lace Rib

ACKNOWLEDGE, v. t.  To confess.  Acknowledgement of one another's faults is the highest duty imposed by our love of truth.

Tunnel Lace

REPOSE, v. i.  To cease from troubling.

Knotted Openwork

PAST TIME, n.  A device for promoting dejection.  Gentle exercise for intellectual debility.

Crocus Buds

PAST, n.  That part of Eternity with some small fraction of which we have a slight and regrettable acquaintance.  A moving line called the Present parts it from an imaginary period known as the Future.  These two grand divisions of Eternity, of which the one is continually effacing the other, are entirely unlike.  The one is dark with sorrow and disappointment, the other bright with prosperity and joy.  The Past is the region of sobs, the Future is the realm of song.  In the one crouches Memory, clad in sackcloth and ashes, mumbling penitential prayer; in the sunshine of the other Hope flies with a free wing, beckoning to temples of success and bowers of ease.  Yet the Past is the Future of yesterday, the Future is the Past of to-morrow.  They are one--the knowledge and the dream.

Simple Lace Rib

OBSOLETE, adj.  No longer used by the timid.  Said chiefly of words.  A word which some lexicographer has marked obsolete is ever thereafter an object of dread and loathing to the fool writer, but if it is a good word and has no exact modern equivalent equally good, it is good enough for the good writer.  Indeed, a writer's attitude toward "obsolete" words is as true a measure of his literary ability as anything except the character of his work.  A dictionary of obsolete and obsolescent words would not only be singularly rich in strong and sweet parts of speech; it would add large possessions to the vocabulary of every competent writer who might not happen to be a competent reader.

Lacy Rib

Ignoramus, n.  A person unacquainted with certain kinds of knowledge familiar to yourself, and having certain other kinds that you know nothing about.

Dumble was an ignoramus,

Mumble was for learning famous.

Mumble said one day to Dumble:

"Ignorance should be more humble.

Not a spark have you of knowledge

That was got in any college."

Dumble said to Mumble: "Truly

Your're self-satisfied unduly.

Of things in college I'm denied

A knowledge--you of all beside."

Zigzag Openwork

DEFAME, v. t.  To lie about another.  To tell the truth about another.

Brick Rib

ARDOR, n.  The quality that distinguishes love without knowledge.

Whelk Pattern

ADVICE, n.  The smallest current coin.

"The man ws in such deep distress,"

Said Tom, "that I could do no less

Than give him good advice." Said Jim:

"If less could have been done for him

I know you well enough, my son,

To know that's what you would have done."

Jebel Jocordy.

Sicilian Cassata Cobbler

See blog for recipe
http://sejourprenonsunpot.blogspot.com/

Basket Rib

BABE or BABY, n.  A misshapen creature of no particular age, sex, or condition, chiefly remarkable for the violence of the sympathies and antipathies it excites in other, itself without sentiment or emotion.  There have been famous babes; for example, little Moses, from whose adventures in the bulrushes the Egyptian hierophants of seven centuries before doubtless derived their idle tale of the child Osiris being preserved on a floating lotus leaf.

Ere babes were invented

The girls were contented.

Now man is tormented

Until to buy babes he has swuandered

His money.  And so I have pondered

This thing, and thought may be

'T were better that Baby

The First had been eagled or dondored.

Ro Amil.